Is money your frenemy?
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Many women have an ambivalent relationship with money. So the question of whether money is their frenemy is justified. A frenemy is simply a friend and an enemy at the same time.
So when you look at your inner dialogue with yourself about money, these five factors can help you clarify whether you see money as a friend or a frenemy.
When you think about money, what is your inner advisory team telling you?
1. Honesty in conducting uncomfortable conversations about money?
Are you comfortable having uncomfortable conversations or talking to yourself about money? Honesty is the cornerstone of any form of relationship, and all parties must be able to discuss their problems face-to-face. So I ask you, does your inner team have uncomfortable conversations about money internally, and are you willing to have uncomfortable conversations about money yourself sometimes, or do you always pretend that everything is fine?
2. Happiness about financial success?
True friends can be happy about your successes and are unlikely to be surprised by them - toxic frenemies, on the other hand, don't think much of you as a person. It's the same with money, if it's your true friend. Are you unreservedly happy about your financial successes, or do you not think much of them?
3. Feeling of not deserving more?
No matter what the occasion - do you never miss an opportunity to talk yourself down when it comes to money and make yourself feel like you don't deserve more?
4. Don't want to share good news about money with anyone, she might be jealous?
Sharing good news and celebrating it is an achievement of our civilization, so celebrate yourself and inspire everyone else with your celebratory mood.
5.Is there always a but?
In an interview with "Reader's Digest", Dr. Jared DeFife, a psychologist from Atlanta, describes this type of criticism as "a slow but steady poison for any relationship" including your relationship with money.See money as a partner, a real person.
If you answer yes to some or all of the questions above, then money is probably your frenemy.
Scientific results suggest that frenemies do indeed play an important role in many people's lives and that there is a tendency to maintain the relationship with such a frenemy, which is certainly often very stressful. Perhaps it seems easier to maintain the relationship as it is rather than going inside and making the necessary changes. Based on the results, the researchers suggest defining "frenemyship" as an "inharmonious relationship" "in which one or both parties (see money as a party here) maintain cordial interaction while simultaneously evaluating the other party suspiciously, unkindly, or even hostilely." So if you really want to turn your money relationship into a friendly one, why not write a letter to your money, addressing all these 5 points and making a commitment to your money on how you will deal with it from now on? You could say I will be honest with you and all your shortcomings. Ask for money for help. Help me celebrate and express happiness and gratitude. Help me. In what ways can I feel like I deserve more? What is your advice for me? When you do this, your relationship with money will become more harmonious over time.
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Karen Wendt
President of SwissFinTechLadies